Hello everyone!

Today, let's talk about Imposter Syndrome and discuss ways to identify this phenomenon  to improve your confidence and career. We’ll talk about what to look out for and how this shows up, especially for high achievers and women. I also want to share actionable strategies that will help you further manage these feelings when they do show up. Lastly, I will share my personal experience with Imposter Syndrome.

What is Imposter Syndrome?
Imposter Syndrome is a term that was coined by a couple of psychologists back in 1970. It showed this sense of inadequacy. “I don't really belong here and people are going to find out.” It's most common in high achievers because they are the people that are always pushing and challenging themselves. If you go to a safe job where you know what's going to happen next and know your role well, then you will experience less of this. Also, if you experience this, it's a sign that you are growing and challenging yourself. It's more common amongst women, but men also experience this. 

How do these statements resonate with you?
1. I attribute my success to luck and timing rather than my hard work and talent. 
2. I worry that others will find out that I am as knowledgeable about this topic and they’re going to find me out.
3. I feel undeserving of my success. 
4. I don’t know if others think I’m worthy to do this job.
5. At any moment I may be exposed as a fraud.

If these statements resonate with you in any way, I’m going to share a few high profile people that have had similar experiences. Maya Angelo wrote, “I have written eleven books, but each time I think, ooo ho I have run a game on everyone and each time think they’re going to find me out.” Einstein wrote, “The exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel so compelled to see myself as an involuntary swindler.” I know that you probably wouldn't expect these statements from these high profile people and that you would think do not experience any self doubt. So you see that you are in good company.

How does it show up? 
It's different for everyone. Anxiety is a common feature--whether you worry if you belong in a role, whether you’re going to do well or not etc. For example, when you prepare for an upcoming project, you worry that no matter how well you prepare you’re going to fail. You have a strong fear of failure. On the other hand, when you do well, you tend to momentarily push it away and move on to the next thing. You don't internalize the praise and success. Perfectionism is another symptom. It's a very high bar that you set for yourself, much higher than anyone has set for you. Overall, It's the general willingness to internalize praise. Some of this also comes from family and culture. Sometimes for men, there’s a fear that they don't want to be more successful than their fathers. Or women fear that they don't want to be more successful than their husbands. 
In my experience, when I was working in executive leadership positions and kept moving up the corporate ladder, the way that imposter syndrome showed up was as follows: I was constantly afraid of the pressure that I was feeling at the time as my responsibilities increased. I was always wondering whether I was good enough to manage them and felt tremendous fear that I was going to fail. Another way that this showed up for me was in my dealings with other male executives in a very male dominated environment. Especially in meetings, I felt that people in the room that had higher authority and experience than me were judging whether I knew my stuff and was also afraid that If I was asked any questions, I wasn't going to know the answers and worried about the embarrassment that they would bring. As a child, I was praised for my achievements, so I grew up thinking that in order to feel worthy, I always had to achieve. Only after my self awareness and personal development journey did I become aware of this. When I was at corporate, I unfortunately did not have the language and awareness that I have now to even name the experience.

When I started my business, I noticed that Imposter Syndrome started showing up again because of the new challenges and growth that I was putting myself through. However, at this time I had more knowledge about healthy coping skills and was equipped with the awareness to take action despite fear. I came out on the other side always feeling good, and my self confidence increased. So experiencing this over and over builds my resilience to just to keep on going. 

How can we overcome Imposter Syndrome? 
Start by measuring your own value and changing how you see yourself. The more we see that we are responsible for our feelings, the less we rely on others to validate us. Self awareness and insight is power--the more we understand the more we choose how these things impact us. Start by acknowledging the syndrome and name it to claim it. Just knowing that there is a name of it and knowing that you are not alone helps you feel better.  Building on that, saying it out loud and getting it out of your head is another effective way in managing it. “In your head, and you're dead”. Has anyone heard this saying? Just saying it out loud helps you get some perspective and gives you a chance to reframe the experience. Share your feelings with people you trust or with a coach.

As women in particular, own your success. Come up with the practice of writing down your accomplishments. This is a helpful process to use for self performance review, updating your resume, etc. Also, when self doubt comes through, you can read that list. You are training your brain to pay attention to the things that you are doing well. Have balanced self awareness--work on areas of development and also balance that with your strengths and abilities. Especially as women we were raised being told that bragging about ourselves is bad. But we have to challenge and change that, because knowing our natural strengths and abilities helps us build the confidence we need to realize our fullest potential.

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!
Visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can find more articles and resources!​

​Hello, everyone and welcome back!

Today, we are talking about a hot topic that I always get asked a lot of questions about from my clients: how to write a really good resume and cover letter that will help you stand out amongst the high number of applicants. Let’s dive right into the best practices that you could apply right away.

RESUME:

1. Update your contact information with a professional email address. 
2. Have a customized LinkedIn URL.
3. You can do this by clicking the “Me” icon, edit profile and url, and edit customer url. Type the last part of your name and save it.
4. Include a professional Objective or Summary
5. This should be an overview of your most important career accomplishments. You can use 2-4 sentences in order to demonstrate your key skills, key outcomes, and demonstrate how your professional background will help the company solve a particular problem. One key hint here: include keywords from the job description here.
6. Format your work experience strategically.
7. List the company name followed by the dates of your employment. List the job title followed by the location. Write your job description followed by 4-6 bullet points showcasing your key accomplishments. Try to use numbers, percents, dollar amounts to showcase results that you helped achieve. 
8. Font selection
9. Best practices is using Verdana, Cambria, Gill Sans. Font size should be between 10-12 for better readability. 
10. Use jobscan.com to help you see how your current resume matches up to a particular position. It helps to better optimize your resume through applicant tracking systems that most companies use. They give you 5 free scans a month.

COVER LETTER:

1. Focus on the format. It should look similar to your resume. Use 4 consistent paragraphs. It should include the date, hiring officials name, address, and department. 
2. Try to spark interest by letting them know what interests you most about the position and the company. You also want to include how you learned about them and why you are so passionate about the position. You can also highlight a referring connection if you have one.
3. Try to create engagement by using the next 2 paragraphs to explain your unique value proposition--what problem can you help the company solve and what unique skills you bring to the table to be able to do this. You should learn as much about the company and position as you can. Use keywords from the job posting. You can also share a story about your most recent accomplishments. 
4. Include a call to action at the end. Maybe you want them to contact you for an interview or maybe leave your email or phone number so that they can follow up with you. The purpose is to get the hiring official to take some type of action and letting them know about your eagerness to start your position. End with a friendly closing greeting such as “Warm regards”. 

I hope this was helpful for you today! If you need additional assistance and support, I offer one on one coaching sessions. Just go to my website at elonaloparicoaching.com to schedule a session and I would be more than happy to assist you. See you here next week, same place and same time.

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

​Visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can find more articles and resources!

Hi all you beautiful friends!

Well jumping right in with our topic today on learning a much needed skill in today’s busy world: time management. How does lack of time management skills keep you from being productive? How much of the week do you spend stressing on all the things that you have to do? How about feeling stuck on your email inbox, where you feel like you have to be connected the whole time? How about the  indecisiveness, energy consumption, and brain power used on figuring out what to do? How about the distractions that we get from being on social media? 

Sometimes, us women wear being busy as a badge of honor. We get so busy being busy that we lose perspective on what kind of tasks are of high value and what kind of tasks are not. We put our efforts into spinning in our hamster wheels. The difference between efficiency vs effectiveness is getting a lot of tasks done vs. getting the right tasks done. Think about which tasks will move your business or career forward. 

Perfectionism is another thing that holds most people back from being productive. I should know, I am a recovering perfectionist. Taking the time to overanalyze a task instead of submitting it and moving on is another waste of time and prevents productivity. Instead, develop the mindset of “It’s good enough” and move on. What really matters is that you improve along the way, so learn to let go. This is like a muscle: the more you do it, the more you get used to it. 

Multitasking is another time waster. By being halfway towards one task and switching suddenly to another (realizing much later that you didn’t finish either one), you extend energy on switching tasks and not completing them. It’s an absolute strain on mental resources. 

Let’s discuss three of the most important time management goals that we all must have. 

1. Family & Personal Goals: how much time to spend with family. 
2. Business & Career Goals: the means by which we achieve our family goals.
3. Personal Development Goals: Your outer life will always reflect your inner life. 

A lot of times we find ourselves in conflict with these three goals. When that happens, I have three questions to ask yourself to keep yourself in check. 

1. What’s really important to me?
   You can ask yourself this question whenever you find yourself with too much to do and so little time. Your answer is what you want to be doing.
2. What are my highest value activities?
   What can I do to add the highest value to my life? What do I enjoy the most that gives me pleasure?
3. What’s the most valuable use of my time right now?
   Since you can only do one thing at a time, you must get organized so that you can get the greatest joy and satisfaction from everything you do. 

​If you can't measure it, you can't improve it. My secret weapon: a calendar. Track everything you do in your calendar and time block your tasks. Throw out your to do list. 41% of the items on your to do list are not completed. Structure and add routine to as many recurring tasks throughout the week so that you have time to focus on other tasks that are more important for you to make progress towards your goals. Also, scheduling tasks and deciding ahead of time frees your brain from finding excuses and procrastination, so it eliminates the need for brain drama.

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

​Visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can find more articles and resources!

​Hello, everyone!

Today, we learn how you can identify your current strengths and skills in order to align them with a successful career. Being aware of your innate talents and skills allows you to perform better at your current workplace and contributes to your personal fulfillment and happiness in life. Being aware of your strengths gives you the direction you need. It allows you to focus your energy and resources on the areas that are your natural strengths. When you know your strengths and skills, you are even better equipped to change your career altogether. 

How to identify your top skills and strengths:

1. Ask yourself: What do you love most about your current career? Circle your favorite parts in the jobs listed in your resume. Take the time and think about other job tasks that don't appear on your resume and jot those down, too. 
2. Where do you lose track of time? What hobbies, activities, or tasks occupy your full attention in the moment so much that when you look up you notice that time has slipped away? These could also be activities in your personal life. What is it that kept you engaged in those activities? What was it that you loved most about them? 
3. Self reflect and come up with a list of what you think your greatest strengths are. You could also ask 3 people who know you well to share what they like most about you. What have you learned about your greatest strengths? 

I personally did all these activities when I stopped working for corporate and jumped into working full time in my business. I took a lot of time to reflect back on what it is that I knew well, what skills I had gathered along the way, and what my greatest accomplishments were. I also reflected back on what things I enjoyed doing the most and where time was lost. I made a list and worked with my mentor on packaging what I knew and finding the audience that needed what I knew. I also went around asking old colleagues and people that I used to work with about what it was that they enjoyed the most when working with me. I gotta say that their perspective was very valuable in helping me identify my strengths and natural abilities.

Here is one more important self reflection question to inspire you: If money was no issue, what would I do for the rest of my life? What do you day dream about doing? Try some of the answers to these questions by taking one small baby step into that direction. Put a plan together by picking a date in the near future and plan out steps to get there. Get curious and take action. This will give you the clarity that you need. Think of ways that you can monetize this passion. You also have to be willing to get uncomfortable when testing out and putting yourself into new situations that will challenge and help you grow. The mindset of being consistent and not giving up will help you get there. 

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

​Visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can find more articles and resources!

Hello everyone!
Today we will be diving into the topic of setting proper boundaries with people and relationships around us. This is a big topic, and I’ve chosen to speak about it in the context of professional work settings and personal relationships. We’ll talk about actionable steps to take away and apply so that you can conserve your self care efforts and overall well being.
The most common personality type that struggles with this issue is people pleasers. People pleasers have a harder time and struggle with setting boundaries. The primary reason is that they don't like saying “no” to people because of the fear that others might be upset with them, leave them, or even be disappointed in them. This codependency makes them more susceptible to giving more than actually getting back. 
Society conditions us to take care of others despite the fact that you also have to learn how to give back to yourself. Fill your own tank first before you can give back to others. For example even in the playground, we see parents that tell their kids to share with others. Even though we want to teach our kids to share with other people, it's also important to teach them and see if they are ready to share. Sometimes, they need to keep the toy longer, and we should consider this fact first before we automatically assume that they are ready to share. There has to be a balance between both of these things. 
Even though it’s great to help others, it's not ok to not take care of ourselves. We’ll feel depleted, resentful, and always look for validation. Sometimes we think, “If I don’t do this then I must not be a good person.” It’s important to understand that if we’re always helping others, we are taking away their lessons for their journey. To figure out whether or not you should be in a “giving” state, ask yourself: “Is this good for me right now? Should I be doing this right now?”
Next, learn to say no and not have to explain yourself. We tend to over explain because we want to feel validated by the other person. Sometimes, we might think that we need to explain because we’re dealing with a pushy or narcissistic personality that won’t take no for an answer. Guilt can be used against you, knowingly or not. If someone is loving towards you, they will not make you feel guilty for saying no and will respect you regardless. Just remember that you don’t owe anyone anything that is outside of your comfort zone. No means no, no explanation necessary.
When someone asks something of you, rather than automatically saying YES, slow down and get in touch with your thoughts, where you are, and what you need. You can say, “I might be able to do it but I’ll let you know.” Learning how to say these phrases is important. Someone that really respects you will be ok with that answer. Personally, when I ask myself “Is this good for me at this point in time?” and really consider the answer, I help out when I am in a good place. It’s not about who they are, what they think of me, or what I might get out of it. 
This extends towards self respect and teaching others how to treat you. Calling someone out on their pushiness is a great way to stand up for yourself and disengage. You will never regret putting yourself first. It's not your job to fix other people and carry their problems as a burden. The more you ask yourself those self loving questions, the more you will learn how to be in touch with your needs. Boundaries are your standards, and communicating with other people that this is the way you want to be treated is crucial. You have to know how you want to be treated and be able to verbally communicate that. You should also do this in a non emotional loving way by being mindful.
Now, let me share the three steps that I came up with that will allow you to practice all of this.

1. Create: Consider your WHY in the context of the relationships around you. I grew up in a codependent family dynamic. I realized that I had to change this, learn how to be independent, and learn to rely less on others around me. So my WHY was that I needed to grow. I was so clear on why it was important to me that it became easier to identify my own needs first. I realized that in order to be more self reliant, I needed to become less available to others. 
2. State: Clearly communicate your needs to others and be able to separate yourself from other people’s reactions. People get used to you being a certain way, so when you change, they get confused. You need to learn to manage your own feelings and separate yourself from the other person’s feelings as well.
3. Maintain: Follow up with what you say. You don’t want to go back to your old ways and get tempted because it’s easier to let things play out. If you don't follow up or hold yourself and others accountable, you give people the ok to push back.

This process will take time and it's not a quick fix. Over time, you will be able to shift your relationships into whole new dynamics and they will become very fulfilling. The end result will be healthier, happier, and more fulfilling relationships. You want to go through the growing pains so that you can get to the other side. 
Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!
Visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can find more articles and resources!

Hello everyone! Hope you enjoyed your week. Let’s talk about the power of focus.

The power of attention or concentration is the most essential in developing the power of our mind. When we know how to direct our attention properly, it is startling. The cultivation of focus and attention is the most important characteristic of any successful person and one worth practicing as a skill in attaining our success.

When we let our brain break the power of focus by removing our attention from another object, we lessen the power of the result that we would have gotten if we concentrated on a particular purpose for a longer period of time. For example, this is apparent when we talk about the power of visualization, which is when we visualize an image of whatever success means to us. We set forces in the universe in motion that work for us on achieving the result we visualize about.

However, this is easier said than done. Choose any single object and concentrate your attention on it for a definite purpose for even 10 minutes. You will see that your mind will wander a dozen times, and it will be necessary to bring it back to the original purpose. Each time the effect will have been lost, and at the end of 10 minutes, nothing will have been gained because you have not been able to hold your thoughts steadily to the purpose. It is through attention that you will finally be able to overcome obstacles of any kind on your path.The only way to get better at this wonderful power is by practice — practice makes perfect in this as in anything else.

Here’s an exercise you can do as well to cultivate the power of attention. Take a picture with you and pay attention to as many details of it as you can, note the expression of the eyes, the hair, the clothes, etc. Now cover it and close your eyes and try to see it mentally. If you can see all the details of the photo perfectly and can form a good mental picture of the photo then you are doing well. If not, repeat the process until you can.

By developing the power of focus in your life, you will find that the circumstances and the environment around you will follow the trend of your mental and spiritual progress. Growth will follow knowledge, action will follow inspiration, opportunity will follow perception. In other words, the spiritual growth will come first and then the transformation into the limitless possibilities of achievement will follow.

Thought is the process by which we may absorb the Spirit of Power and hold the result in our inner consciousness until it becomes part of our ordinary consciousness. The method of accomplishing this result by the persistent practice of this principal is the key that unlocks the storehouse of Universal Truth.

I will leave you with this quote: “That a man can change himself, improve himself, re-create himself, control his environment, and master his own destiny is the conclusion of every mind who is wide awake to the power of right thought in constructive action.” — Larsen

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

​For more, I have a FREE “Guide to Top 10 Mental Blocks for Entrepreneurs” when you visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can take these concepts further so they can help you right away.

Hello, everyone! Hope everyone had a great week.

Today we talk about finding the balance between work and personal life.

I know this is a topic that a lot of my clients struggle with. Finding that sweet spot between building your business and having a life outside of that, not to mention free time for self care, is an ongoing obstacle that all of us struggle with. When I started my business, I remember being so involved and focused in all the areas of it and wearing all the many hats as a solopreneur. It took a heavy toll on my mental health and close relationships. Not to mention the mom guilt that came with not giving my kids the needed one on one attention or much quality time, feeling burned out, and losing sight of the bigger vision as to why I was doing this in the first place. I have been there and I understand the struggle. 

I wish I could tell you that I have a clear cut solution to this problem, and I could wave a magic wand and make the problem go away, but unfortunately that’s not the case. Building a business and having a life outside of that is a constant work in progress for all of us. However, I will share 5 ways I try to keep the balance. 

1. Planning and prioritizing your week is a must have. I choose a day of the week (Monday morning for me) where I do a brain dump exercise. I grab a pen and paper and write down everything that my brain can think of that I have to do that day, week, month, year etc. I look through my calendar, notes, and emails and make sure that I jot down everything. Next, I get overwhelmed. Hahaha, gotcha! I stare at the sheet of paper and I start prioritizing my list ABCDE. D stands for Delegate and E stands for Eliminate and I give myself permission to eliminate things on my list which I no longer think are important. Next, I go to schedule all this in my calendar. First thing I schedule on my calendar is my FREE time. 
   
   
2. Next, I schedule my monthly getaways with myself, hubby, or family. These are used to help me recharge and give myself white space to reflect.  
   
   
3. Relationship with self when scheduling tasks is crucial to getting things done and for your self esteem. When you build a habit of showing up for yourself every time, you start building self respect and learn to build your confidence by always learning to rely on yourself to accomplish what you set out to do, This is how you build a belief that you do everything you always set your mind to, and that’s powerful.
   
   
4. For those of you that are in a relationship or have kids, you need to schedule time with your loved ones ahead of time and be intentional with that time. This is the time that you can be guilt free because you are present for the people in your life. This way, when it's time to work, the guilt over not spending enough time with hubby and kids does not lurk around in your brain.
   
   
5. Write your bigger visions on a visual board and look at them everyday if you can. Reminding you everyday of your “why” will keep your emotional juices flowing when challenges come up (as they will) and keep you connected and engaged in the bigger picture that you set for your life.

Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

​For more, I have a FREE “Guide to Top 10 Mental Blocks for Entrepreneurs” when you visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can take these concepts further so they can help you right away.
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